Hope Letter
My beautiful angel, my hope is that this letter finds you all well, blessed and full of joy!
I know, gee sh another letter he he. I received a rerouted letter from you. Pictures of you Maddie, Austin the thing from Nicholas funeral and a note from you post marked November 27, 2018. Nick seemed like a good kid. Not that he wants to hear it but, please give Kevin my deepest condolence! I grieve for him.
The letter from Maddie sure brought a smile to my face and warmth to my heart! I miss and love them both very much and I am so very proud of them both! I know I am pretty much a stranger to the both again but, I carry both of them in my heart each and every day. Please understand in my heart, soul and mind they are my kids too. I know but it’s just how I feel. I have enclosed a letter to Maddie. Also with your letter I received a Christmas card from mom, addressed directly to me. Hmm mom has my new mailing address just saying ha ha yup, she says I can’t be named ….however my common sense was equal to my namesake. I would say. Do you think this is still carved into the bench next to the place I met you 1984June17 and married you 1988may29 God is good! Mark 10:6-12
Family
I cannot express how much I love the pictures! You are just so beautiful. I love to look at you and the kids are amazing! I just want to be with you guys so very much, my heart aches to be with my family each day! That’s what drives me to do everything I can to come home as soon as possible. Sometimes it hurts but, I get a letter or hear your sweet voice and the hurt subsides. Then, when I get to hold your sweet hand and look deep into your beautiful eyes all of a sudden the bars just disappear. No one else exists just you and me. One mind, one body, one soul. That’s what a privilege it is to love you and that my amazing soul mate can only be from God
Kids Grown
I can’t believe how grown up and perfect the kids are! You are a great parent baby! If you could hear the stories of people’s children in hear (inmates, free and custody staff) crazy, Austin and Maddie are wonderful and amazing and always have been! I cannot remember one time I was disappointed with either of them ever! Only in myself for not being or doing better! I can’t count how many times I have heard I can’t wait until they turn 18 and get out gee sh all I could ever think is I hope they just live with us always. Knowing I am just the step dad yet for many years because of flexible employment I had them more than anyone and I loved that time. Hopeful for more but, I know they are older now and independent.
Austin
It’s good that Austin wants more mom time. That’s good for him cuz mom is fantastic! I just got to speak to you on the phone. I love your voice sorry, I freaked out a bit about being delivered to Chico but, that is not safe! FEMA
I am going to send a visiting form as soon a possible but, I have to obtain one first, getting the form or anything done in this prison is a challenge at best! You said to send two, I assume one for Madison and one for Austin but, I will send one first for Madison and if Austin asks I will send another.
I don’t think he wants to visit but, he doesn’t want to come out and say it, that’s okay I really do understand. I’m basically a stranger to him now and his anxiety makes the situation difficult. Although, I love him and respect how he feels and do not want to make him uncomfortable. It’s easy for me because, nothing changed in my life another than surroundings. For me my family never changed, just taken away. I still do think its crazy how much like me he is though!
Law Signed Into California
Well on that note I guess I will scoot for now oh real quick. Mac Reps are saying something about a law signed into California within the last 30 days about stopping and reversing ‘over sentencing? Like me 7 charges for one (lie) incident have you heard anything? The way they explain it, it sound like the base term thing but, I am not sure.
Okay well I will close now, I love, miss, appreciate adore and desire you! Forever yours. Please give my love to mom and kids. Visiting here has an outside area mu ah. 2018Dec15
My beautiful soul mate, I hope this letter finds you all well, blessed and happy! I know this was fast to write again but, I obtained a visiting forms one included and the marriage packet. So, I guess we will not be getting married here, I sent the rules not only do they require $5.00 to purchase an extra ID but also $10 for notaries thing so $15 to be taken off my books and a certified birth certificate that matches my prison name. So that sucks and to top it off they want $225 for the person conducting the ceremony which is our resident chaplain who is a paid employee. I sent you the instructions page one. So, upon my transfer or release we will re-marry. Gods will my love.
I hear some laws changed about convicted felons having the ability to be licensed in certain fields like paralegal, medical, etc. Just want to know our options. Anything I can get certified to do in here I want to of course.
Policies
I hope to be home sooner than later, maybe even married next year 2019 Outside these bars never know and work on my appeal that just stopped? Still no change of address anyway no good news about committee. The counselor told people today if we do committee this week, we will call you in. So much for policy, procedure or law! So far the prisons I have been in other than Valley State Prison
Okay, rant complete so I get to call you tonight, I cannot wait. I sure hope your Monday goes better than mine. I’m going to ask for a transfer in committee and my annual if I am still here. If I get released from here are you going to pick me up or do you want me to take the bus? Guess we will figure that out then, well, I am gonna scoot and get this stuff in the mail I love, miss, appreciate, adore and desire you! all of my love forever, please give my love to mom and the kids, mu ah 2018Dec17
Christmas
My beautiful angel, I hope this letter finds you all well, blessed and happy! I sure wish I could be with all of you today. As we celebrate the birth of our amazing savior. I also celebrate the reunification to my beautiful soul mate chosen by him. To bestow that love upon! My God leaves me speechless my wife leave me breathless. I know I am kinda a cheese ball. But, I speak from my heart. I sit here looking out the window watching the people outside the fence going to and fro some dressed in their best.
I’m wondering what my family is doing and trying to imagine what we would be doing today if I was home? I also can’t help but, reminisce of Christmas spent with you, kid’s, house full of guest all the way back to Stockton and Forest-hill with you, parents, sisters so many more to come. I cannot wait.
Sex, Drugs And Alcohol Are Running Rapid
So far today has been rather eventful. I guess two men were caught having sex in the bathroom so one of them rolled up and left the yard. The second half of the incident a transgender stayed. If this man is indeed a transgender as he claims looks and acts. He should not even be in this living environment! No way to use shower or toilet alone. Crazy, how they have all the rights in here. The cops are even scared of them! It was even worse at Mule Creek and then of course are the drugs and alcohol. There is so much pain being covered up in here, its pretty bad here, I say that because, I have been offered Marijuana, Crystal meth, Heroin and a couple different types of alcohol today. Praise the Lord for strength of sobriety! Never done drugs of course (as you know) but, all other worlds traps!
I get to hear your beautiful angelic voice in a few minutes. Just got off the phone with you and I am so happy to hear your sweet loving voice. It just melts me and I get to call again after dinner. Maybe even talk to the kids. I so wish I was there holding you in my arms. Kissing your sweet lips! Dinner was okay tonight, I received a 3 oz cup of orange sherbet and the mashed potatoes were okay. then, off to phone. It was so nice to talk to you twice and talk to Maddie. I miss my family so very much. Maddie sounds so grown up gee sh! Lucky for me you still like stuff not so grown up. Movies, etc. me ha ah marry me darn it!
Dreaming
Self employment for our family has consumed my mind the past couple weeks as well as our house and pine-covered property! I even had a recent dream Austin and I shooting compound bows on our own property in front of our own house Weird huh. I didn’t want to mention it because, I didn’t want you to stress about it but, since you mentioned it, so did I. Home is where my family is.
Oh my goodness Microsoft Theater
Counselor and Committee
I went to my mental health committee today. They wanted me to up my Zoloft to 50 mg double what I take but, I decline for now.
The counselor in my committee told me I was assigned to vocational work, office services on 2018Dec18. I have not received a ducat for such but, I hope that is correct, milestones. I think its 10 or 13 not sure! But anytime off is good! He also said I was on the building maintenance mechanics list. I think that’s the plant operation thing in other words maintenance on the prison. They probably know I am the only inmate actually concerned about the security of the institution, oh well.
Lie
I won’t let this lie and the negative results of such change who I am! Anyhow I hope all is well with you guys. I miss, love, appreciate and adore you! You are my beautiful, angelic soul mate and best friend for eternity! Please give my love to mom and kids. 2018Dec25
